All posts tagged brain disorder
I'm not always wearing my full habit...
My name is Malcolm Bowden, I’m a committed evangelical Christian, and have been giving true Biblical counselling to many people with mental health problems. And from my experience, I believe that depression is a behavioural problem, rooted in pride, self-centredness, and self-pity.
Malcolm Bowden, Christian Evangelical Geocentric Creationist (via marnanel)
Sigh.
While there are behavioral aspects to depression and other brain disorders, the disorders themselves are most certainly not chosen. These disorders are caused by an organic problem in the brain tissues. Unfortunately, depressive illness does affect our behavior. Depression makes it much more difficult for us to make good choices, but even in the severest, darkest depression, we retain the power to choose.
In February 1998, after I took an overdose of sleeping pills, washed down with Everclear, the social worker at the hospital quietly said something to me that I will never forget: I wish you had made a different choice. I was stunned. A different choice? How could I possibly make a different choice? I was hopeless, worthless, fundamentally unlovable. I was nothing but a burden, draining life from the people I loved. Was it not my responsibility to remove this burden from them, so that they could be free to live their lives unencumbered? I wish you had made a different choice. Right, I thought. A different choice.
It took years for these words to really become part of me. They remained in my thoughts and feelings, a prickly and uncomfortable weed, but they found living soil, and they grew, and eventually they bore fruit. I wrestled with where depression ends and where sin begins, because while depression certainly shadowed all of my choices, they were still my choices.
Eventually, I concluded that the sin begins when we choose to reject God. Oh, we don’t say this in so many words… well, not always. I certainly told God to eff the aitch off and leave me the eff alone, before I took those pills that day. We reject God in a million little ways. A depressed person may allow themself to sink into despair. They may allow fear and anger to rule. It is unimaginably more difficult to choose something else when this organic brain disorder is in the way… but we can try.
Unfortunately, Mr. Bowden has confused the symptoms and manifestations of major depressive disorder with the cause of it. But the symptoms are not the disease. The effects are not the cause. And organic disorders of the brain are not chosen.
Malcolm Bowden, Undercover Nun is praying for your soul.
(Source: blog.echurchwebsites.org.uk)
Of brain disorder, assassination, and fear
Here in southeastern Virginia, one local news station has stirring up paranoia and fear. Why? John Hinckley, Jr. is due to be released from the hospital soon. Mr. Hinckley attempted to assassinate President Reagan in 1981. I was home sick from school that day, and I was sitting on my parents’ bed with my mom watching television when this happened. It was a scary thing, seeing this larger-than-life man being shot, and I’m glad this happened before the cable news stations had to try to fill every minute of the day with action. I was too young to really follow the story of the investigation and the trial. I was far too young to understand what insanity meant; it was a scary word, conjuring up images of Arkham Asylum and other dark places.
Undercover Nun is far better acquainted with insanity now. In 1998, I was hospitalized three times with severe depression, the third time following a suicide attempt. I’d heard words like schizophrenic and manic-depressive and multiple personality before, but I hadn’t known what they meant; they were just dark and scary. But during those weeks in the hospital, I encountered other men and women who suffered with depression, with bipolar disorder, with the hallucinations and delusions of schizophrenia and other psychoses, even one woman who was truly dissociated. It was still pretty scary to see that we truly can “lose” our minds. It was humbling to realize how tenuous our control over our thoughts and feelings truly is. I loved my fellow patients, my heart breaking anew to see the suffering.
While I was in the hospital, I also saw some wonderful things. I saw patients arrive in a complete fog, not responding to anyone around them, so depressed that they were paralyzed. And then I saw the miracle brought about by ECT, that within 2 or 3 days, these catatonic women and men became engaged in the world around them, cheerful and chatty. It was resurrection. I saw hope take fire in that dissociated woman, who had finally found a doctor who had experience helping merge the dissociated pieces. She arrived under a black cloud, afraid to touch or to let anyone touch her; she left beaming, even giving me a hug.
Mr. Hinckley was ruled to be insane, and he has been confined to St. Elizabeths hospital in DC since his trial. He has had increasing freedom to leave the hospital for visits with his mom in Williamsburg. A judge ordered that he get a driver’s license again, and almost a year ago a doctor at the hospital testified that Mr. Hinckley is no longer a danger to himself or to others. He wants to live with his mother, who lives in a posh gated community in Williamsburg, and his siblings are ready to support him. But the residents of this community are afraid of the damage to the reputation of their homes, and have the cash to try to fight this.
This news station has aired “reports” over recent days, stirring up fear that Mr. Hinckley might be sitting in the next booth while you’re out for dinner, or two rows behind you in the movie theater… and you won’t even know it!
Undercover Nun wonders why it would matter one whit whether you knew that a volunteer librarian who is under treatment for an organic brain disorder was sitting in a movie theater with you.
Undercover Nun wonders how these wealthy Kingsmill residents would feel if their sister had been in a mental hospital for three decades and had the opportunity to be released and return home.
Undercover Nun wonders why a person would think that he or she would have the right to decide who can or cannot move into the neighborhood, particularly if this decision would involve blatant discrimination against people with disabilities.
Undercover Nun wonders why gates around neighborhoods would make anyone feel more safe or secure, because gates keep out only those who follow the rules already.
Undercover Nun wonders when professed Christians (not that I know Mr. Camp or Ms. Michael to be such) will truly believe that healing is possible, that reconciliation can happen in this world, that people can be made new and can have second chances, that forgiveness is not only possible but mandatory, and that even the worst sinner will be redeemed.
Undercover Nun wonders when we will let go of our fears, the fears that lurk behind every anger, the fears that separate us from the abundance of life God has given us, the fears that are not just the opposite of faith but the rejection of it.
And Undercover Nun prays for our immortal souls. May God have mercy on us all.
Because the disabled elderly are fine on their own, right?
Take a look at this woman’s face. Seriously, take a deep breath and then really look at the woman in this photo. What do you see?
Undercover Nun sees pure joy. I see that amazing smile, the light in her eyes, the hope and sparkle and happiness.
About a year ago, joy returned to Helen Grohman’s life.
The 96-year-old woman began to ask her daughter: “Am I going to see my friends today?”
Other mornings she asks, “Am I going to work today?”
What changed? What brought the joy back? It was the GEM Center, in the Outer Banks of North Carolina, a therapeutic group respite program for adults with dementia and other mental disabilities. Here, Mrs. Grohman got to work, to play games, to exercise, to sing, to meet with other adults in a safe, pleasant environment.
I’m sure this brought a lot of joy to her daughter’s life, too. Being the caregiver to your mother, or for anyone, is incredibly difficult. This center allowed Ms. Tanya Grohman to work, to socialize, to add some sparkle to her own life. But because of zoning issues, cuts in county grants, and a drop in enrollment after the center was forced to move out of its home in a cozy cottage, the only therapeutic group adult respite program on the Outer Banks is about to close.
“I was just in shock when Gail [Soresso, director] told me. I just went home and cried,” Tanya Grohman, of Manteo, said. “There’s nobody else doing this. Even if you have all the money to pay, there’s nobody doing it.”
The really sad part of the story is this:
Given Dare County’s aging population and the frequency of dementia-related illnesses, Sonnesso estimates that as many as 1,000 residents could benefit from GEM services. But the stigma attached to mental illness often prevents caregivers from seeking alternative treatments for their loved ones, said Sonnesso, who holds a master’s degree in vocational evaluation and rehabilitation counseling.
That’s right: as many as 1,000 adult residents of the area could improve their quality of life substantially — not to mention the quality of life of their caregivers — through programs like those at the GEM Center. But now they won’t, and that is a tragedy not only for the participants, their families, and the employees at GEM, but to the entire region. It is so much harder to build a program like this from scratch than it is to sustain one that is already running.
It is good news that Ms. Sonnesso plans to offer a “Supper Club,” and I love that she wants to help educate caregivers. Undercover Nun prays that from this Supper Club program, the seeds for a new respite center will be planted.
Undercover Nun prays for the Misses Grohman, for strength, wisdom, and hope.
I pray also for Ms. Sonnesso and the employees of the GEM Center. May you find meaningful work helping others who need you.
And I pray for the government in Kill Devil Hills and Dare County. May God have mercy on your immortal souls.
Mental health has a way of cutting down our pride like no other illness can. For the one with the illness, pride does not seem to be an issue. They are either blissfully happy with the way they are and are unconcerned with what others think, or they are totally depressed about everything, or they are too confused to worry about pride. If they are concerned about what others think it is with suspicion, not embarrassment.
Carol Flett, at Everyday Christian
Undercover Nun knows that there is a word for this: bullshit. Let’s take it one sentence at a time.
Mental health has a way of cutting down our pride like no other illness can. Wait a minute, mental health is an illness? Clearly Ms. Flett is confused here. Better wording would have been to say Mental illness has a way of cutting down our pride like no other disorder can. This carelessness typifies the entire blog post.
For the one with the illness, pride does not seem to be an issue. Speaking as a mental illness survivor, this is patently untrue. Mental illness carries vicious stigma, and many/most who suffer from mental illness are deeply ashamed. In Western culture — the culture of I think, therefore I am — the very idea that one might not be able to control one’s own mind is frightening and threatening. This is why we all fear the mentally ill, why we try to hide them away, as if depression or schizophrenia were somehow contagious. No, pride is a major issue for anyone with a mental illness, especially bipolar disorder and dementia, the specific disorders Ms. Flett writes about.
They are either blissfully happy with the way they are and are unconcerned with what others think, or they are totally depressed about everything, or they are too confused to worry about pride. REALLY? For one, not all mania is euphoric, Ms. Flett; dysphoric mania is a very different creature. And even in mania, the person with bipolar disorder is still aware that she or he has this condition and still experiences pride and shame. Godly humility may not be possible in every mania, but guilt and shame certainly are. Depression carries with it an incredibly deep sense of shame, that one deserves to be punished. Depression is a completely self-centered illness, which creates a false humility that is a masquerade for pride. And totally depressed about everything is a glib and insulting phrase. If you write about mental illness again, don’t ever use this phrase. Dementia also carries a heavy load of shame. Do you seriously think that no dementia patient, even in the early stages, fails to realize what is happening? No dementia patient feels shame at being unable to and disallowed from taking care of himself or herself? If so, then you have never visited a nursing home.
If they are concerned about what others think it is with suspicion, not embarrassment. Again, patently untrue. Each of these conditions — along with other brain disorders — carries with it deep embarrassment, deep shame. Even those who experience terrifying hallucinations, who are very suspicious of others, feel embarrassed and ashamed when confronted with evidence that others are not experiencing what they are.
Despite Ms. Flett’s story about her daughter’s bipolar disorder — which shows not humility but humiliation — it is clear that she has no idea what it is like to suffer and struggle with a brain disorder. Reading the “related posts” on her blog turns my stomach.
Carol Flett, Undercover Nun prays that you never have to learn firsthand the embarrassment, shame, guilt, and stigma that come with mental illness. And I pray God’s forgiveness for wishing you could experience these for only one day, to discover the truth on these matters that you do not understand.
Undercover Nun prays each day for victims of brain disorders, including depression, bipolar disorder, personality disorders, schizophrenia, epilepsy and seizure disorders, and migraine. May God fill us with healing power, that we be brought to wholeness and health in body, mind, and spirit.
(Source: blog.echurchwebsites.org.uk)
about church and safety
Undercover Nun notices that we spend a whole lot of time making church a safe place — safe from abuse of power, safe from child molestation, safe from unpleasantness. And it’s a good thing to cherish and protect our beloved church members.
But are we missing something here? Church shouldn’t be just safe from; Church should be safe for. Church should be safe for those of us who are broken, those of us who have physical limitations, those of us who have brain disorders (from dementia to depression, from Alzheimer’s to the autistic spectrum, from personality disorders to cancer or stroke), those of us who dress differently, those of us who may not speak English, those of us who can’t read, those of us who haven’t had a shower in a few days, those of us who don’t have an address. Church should be safe for absolutely everyone.
When we make our churches safe from, are we shutting our doors to the people who really need the Church to be safe for them?
New Line Of German Stuffed Animals With Mental Illnesses
For your gift giving consideration: Dub the severely depressed turtle? German toymaker Paraplush has designed a controversial new line of toys with an assortment of psychiatric disorders. The company advertises stuffed animals who suffer from a range of mental illnesses (bipolar disorder, depression, multiple personality disorder) and even come packaged with a personalized medical history and treatment plan.
Undercover Nun does NOT approve in any product that increases stigma against those with brain disorders. These so-called toys are reprehensible. Paraplush and Martin Kittsteiner should be ashamed. I pray for their immortal souls.
For Iraq veteran with post-traumatic stress, help never came
… and instead, he is in jail when what he has needed all along is competent health care.
Daryl Beamer hadn’t been himself for a long time, and his violent trance that night, a little more than a year ago, came as no surprise. It had been nine months since Daryl returned from more than a year in Iraq. The signs that he wasn’t all right were immediately apparent to his family. The night of his homecoming, at a Ruby Tuesday where they’d gone to celebrate, Daryl screamed obscenities at the waiter when their food took too long. A few weeks later, he called his mother to confess that he couldn’t stop thinking about suffocating Yessenia with a pillow.
With all the attention that has been paid in recent years to the psychological effects of war, Daryl’s story might seem predictable: A previously happy guy is sent into battle. He sees terrible things. He comes home a different person – forgetful, angry, violent. His buddies and his chain of command see that he is not OK. By now they all know what PTSD stands for. They’ve all heard the cautionary tales, drilled in by the military over and over, about what can happen when even the most subtle warning signs go ignored.
So they intervene.
But that is where Daryl’s story diverges. The warning signs were not subtle: He tried to set his house on fire while his two small children slept down the hall. Yet for months afterward, and despite vehement pleas from his mother, intervention never came. Instead he was left to fall apart the rest of the way . Then one night last November, he wandered into town with a small black pistol, shoved it in the faces of a few strangers and demanded money.
“It took the police all of 10 minutes to find him,” his mother says, shrugging . “He didn’t even try to get away.”
Ozawa blames the Army for the fact that Daryl, now 26, will probably spend the better portion of a decade in prison. To anyone who will listen, she explains that her son’s story goes more like this: Yes, he was a good boy before Iraq. Yes, he came home someone else. And yes, she recognized the seriousness of his troubles. But when she begged the military to treat him, her son’s superiors dismissed her, leaving Daryl to languish until he became so ill that he was getting drunk every day just to cope, starting fights and failing to show up for formation.
How long, O Lord? How long will your suffering children be imprisoned instead of helped? How long will warfighters return from battle to a life they no longer know how to live? How long will our stiff-necked people allow this to continue?
Those with eyes, let them see! Those with ears, let them hear! God’s children suffer for the deeds of humans, and who is there to help them?
O God who created all that is, who breathed life into plants and animals and persons and declared them all to be very good, rescue these your damaged children. Make the bones of the earth to groan at the injustice of your people!
Send our warfighting brothers and sisters home, to warm and loving hearths, to the food and drink of life-giving medical treatment, to the compassionate bosoms of support groups and social workers.
Rescue them from prisons and jails, and make straight their paths to hospitals and therapists.
Give peace to nations ravaged by war, to hearts and minds inflamed with violence.
And bring us all into your loving arms, your compassionate bosom, where we can join with the entire company of heaven in life everlasting.
